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Monday, January 28, 2008

Attack of the recycling bin

So...my neighbors really love me. They especially love when I park in front of their house. NOT! Somehow they became delusional in thinking that the PUBLIC street right in front of their house belongs to them. Well...it doesn't. My fam damily owns freakin HALF of the block.

Anyway...I'm runnin late for work last wednesday and it just so happens to be trash day. I'm parked on the street and the dumpster is all up in my grill(or my car's rather...) I make my way out and get to the stop sign at the end of the street. What the heck was making that scraping sound? I look in the side rear view mirror.

HELLO--Someone...no idea who, but they definitely drink German beer...had hooked their recycling bin onto the rear of my car! It's stuck up in the wheel well. HAHA.
I got out of the car and laughed hideously. Then detached the cheery yellow fellow and left it at the end of the street. Good thing it was just trash day...this could get interesting.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

My Ice Scraper.

Once upon a time, a girl loved Hawaii. She loved the sun and the sand and the pineapples and then ocean and the beautiful Island men(of course). BUT...she moved back to Virginia.
One day, (maybe it was TODAY) it snowed. It was beautiful on all the trees! After work, this girl walked out to her car, turned it on, and started looking for her ice scraper.
MUCH TO HER DISMAY...It was nowhere to be found. That's when she located her skimboard. (See visual) ooooh and THIS
Lesson 1: Skimboards have multiple uses.
Lesson 2: Use caution when operating, their aerodynamic nature is tricky and can(and did) result in injury.
Lesson 3: Careful because they can scratch paint on cars.
Lesson 4: (Question, rather) Why would you have a skimboard in your trunk if you live in a place where it snows?
Lesson 5: People who have such items in their trunk should possibly contemplate a move.

Monday, January 14, 2008

I PASSED MY TEST!

FYI---I am now, officially a CERTIFIED THERAPEUTIC RECREATION SPECIALIST. Watch out. I might therapize ya.

Bustin Outta Here

So...the outing...It was my first one that I planned. We are supposed to select patients that we think could benefit from a community re-entry experience. So I chose 4 people who had NOT been into the community at all since they had been incarcerated. They are only allowed to go out because they have reached a civil commitment level. We went bowling..because I'm REALLY good at it. hehe. Walter, one of my patients announces to the room, yelling

"This is my first time in public since my incarceration...WOW...20 years and 4 months!"

Everyone in the whole place was totally freaked out. It doesn't help that poor little Walter looks a bit spooky. Another one of my patients was so embarrassed he said that he wanted to stick his head inside his shoe so no one could see him. All in all...everything went well...and I WON. :) All in a days work, right?

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Skateboarding in Your Birthday Suit.

By the way, my newest patient admitted this week was arrested on Christmas Eve bc he was skateboarding naked in front of the white house. :) Gloria in Excelsis De-o0o0o0!

When I assessed him, he said that "if anyone should be allowed to do it, it would be me." ...Then he told me he was "the christ" but not to tell anyone because he didn't want people to start acting funny around him. He said he wanted to observe them in their daily routines. OH BOY. I made sure to be on my absolute best behavior for the rest of the week.

No Hawaii for now...

So...bad news about the job... They are not able to hire me for at least 6 months. BUT...she did say that in June they are having a Pediatric Weight Mgmt Camp for a week and they will need to hire someone Full time for the week. Her idea is that I can come out for a couple weeks, working the camp one week and then chill for the rest of the time I'm there. That way I would be hired on as a Shriners Hospital employee and it would be easier to change my status from "call-in" to full time. :) I'm remaining hopeful.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Crunk-a-licious breath

New years was certainly interesting My friend steph and I were dropping our friend off and this girl comes running up to my car begging for a ride. She said that she was out with her husband and he had screamed at her and shoved her in the middle of the bar. She was so drunk...kinda funny. I think I caught a buzz from her breath. Good thing I didn't get pulled over for a checkpoint. Still haven't heard the final decision from Hawaii about the Shriners job. So...the more time that goes by, the more skeptical I am about getting the job. BUT...my password is Hawaii08 so its gonna happen one way or another.

Insight into the new Job-o-rama & my new boys ;)

So...I've officially decided that my new job is psycho. I've picked up some stalkers there and everywhere I go...they're there. I worked this past weekend and was having lunch in a group room. Thiere's a long skinny windown in the door that's about 3 inches wide. Tell me why it was completely full of faces from top to bottom of creepy men staring at me? haha. One of my "boyfriends" is getting discharged this week. he says "so...now that I'm gonna be out in the real world, you and I can have a real world relationship." AWESOME--that's exactly what I was hoping for.

How it's gonna be

So...the reason I have never kept a journal is because it drives me WILD when I don't write in it everyday and keep things up to date. So...I'm officially done trying to catch my blog up with my life.
Here's the Reader's Digest version:
After Hawaii, I moved back to Va...worked with dementia patients for a year and in November 07 started a job in Mental Health. And thus this blog has now become...

A place for me to write all the freakin crazy stories of things that happen to me while at home, at work, at play...Guess the song.